Rick Santorum, Republican candidate for president, said on Monday that he opposes gay marriage because paper towels are not napkins.

According to the San Francisco Chronicle, Santorum made his remarks in the food court of a HyVee grocery store in Iowa Falls, Iowa.

“I can call this napkin a paper towel,” Santorum told a crowd of roughly 40 people “But it is a napkin. And why? Because it is what it is. Right? You can call it whatever you want, but it doesn't change the character of what it is. So when people come out and say that marriage is something else – marriage is the marriage of 5 people – 5, 10, 20. Marriage can be between fathers and daughters. Marriage can be between any two people, any four people, any 10 people, it can be any kind of relationship and we can call it marriage. But it doesn't make it marriage. Why? Because there are certain qualities and certain things that attach to the definition of what marriage is.”

Last week, Santorum made a similar argument: “It's like saying this glass of water is a glass of beer. Well, you can call it a glass of beer, but it's not a glass of beer. It's a glass of water. And water is what water is. Marriage is what marriage is.” (The video is embedded in the right panel of this page.)

On Wednesday, Santorum is expected to board the National Organization for Marriage's (NOM) anti-gay marriage bus tour, which is making its way through Iowa to the Ames Straw Poll.