Johnny Depp and Alan Rickman, who knew they could sing?  Slim reviews Tim Burton’s macabre musical Sweeney Todd.  The bitch loved it.

I’m going to tunnel my way through this internet connection, pop out the other end and pinch your cheeks or slap your face.  Keep reading to find out which.

What’s up Latin America?  First we get word of Argentina’s gay mega-hotel and now Uruguay goes for ‘mo marriage! 

She’s gay, she’s straight, she’s Tila Tequila on MTV!  Was it the tequila Tila?

Cinnadunkers at Applebees; only in America, baby.

In the arrested/convicted column we have: Amy Winehouse arrested in London, R. Kelly on trial in Chicago, and Don Vito convicted in Colorado.  Rest easy; Britney has not been arrested yet.

What would Christmas be without a little political exploitation?  Mike Huckabee sent out a Christmas ad this week that did just that.  I put a lump of coal in a box, gift wrapped it, and sent it to him – don’t open till Christmas!!

Slim and I stopped in at The Olive Garden this week (was his birthday, so he paid) where our waitress greeted us with, “Howdy, y’all!”  Is this what they mean by hospitaliano?

Deb Price of Creatives.com brings us an inspired read on Giuliani’s gay flip-flop, trumped only by Debra Saunder’s take on Clinton’s “faux experience” – worth your time.

Holly Gray emailed me to check out the band Kamera at My Space.  I can dig it. 

Finally, David Foxley of The New York Observer likes Carson Kressley’s new reality show Crowned on The CW.   Observed Foxley of Carson, “Dressed like some kind of gay Hugh Hefner in velvet slippers, he gleefully sends up a stream of sassy jabs at the 22 down-home gals.”  Yet I don’t think Carson is having any legendary Hefner sex.

Can you give me some bon mots?  Ms McAdam writes, “Whenever you say a sentence you use three things: a noun, a verb and your godamn bons mots!”  I’m over asking her.

I miss suck.com.

The Gay Slant pops-in most Saturdays at On Top Magazine.

Walter Weeks is a writer for On Top Magazine and can be reached at ww@ontopmag.com.