In a recent interview with Rolling
Stone, singer Shawn Mendes talked about the pressure he feels to
prove he's not gay.
Mendes has previously addressed rumors
about his sexuality, saying in 2010 that he's “not gay” and that
“it shouldn't make a difference.”
“On some parts of the Internet,
outing him has become a spectator sport,” Rolling Stone
“In the back of my heart, I feel like
I need to go be seen with someone – like a girl – in public, to
prove to people that I’m not gay. Even though in my heart I know
that it’s not a bad thing,” Mendes
said. “There’s still a piece of me that thinks that. And I
hate that side of me.”
The 20-year-old Mendes said that he
felt “sick” after he allowed Taylor Swift to post a video of him
having glittery eye makeup applied.
“I felt sick,” he said. “I was
like, 'Fuck, why did I let her post that? I just fed the fire that
I'm terrified of.”
Mendes acknowledged that he's in touch
with his feminine side, having grown up “braiding hair and painting
nails” with his family.
“Maybe I am a little more feminine –
but that's the way it is. That's why I am me,” he said.
Mendes added that such scrutiny could
be damaging to a person who is closeted.
“I thought, ‘You fucking guys are
so lucky I’m not actually gay and terrified of coming out.’
That’s something that kills people. That’s how sensitive it is.
Do you like the songs? Do you like me? Who cares if I’m gay?”