Chicago Blackhaws forward Andrew Shaw on Wednesday apologized for hurling an anti-gay slur at a referee on Tuesday night.

“I wanted to apologize for my actions,” he told reporters. “I have no excuses for anything. I want to apologize to the gay and lesbian community. That's not the type of guy I am. This is hard for me.”

“I saw the video last night and I had a tough time sleeping. It has gotten to me. I let my emotions get the better of me. I want to apologize to the organization, the NHL and my teammates, my family, my friends. Obviously I'm sorry. It's a tough time for me right now.”

Later on Wednesday, the NHL announced that it was suspending Shaw for one game, fining him $5,000 for an “inappropriate gesture” toward an official and requiring him to undergo sensitivity training.

In video of the incident, Shawn can be seen pounding his hockey stick against the penalty box glass and yelling, “Fuck you, fucking faggot.”

“I'm upset with myself obviously. I'll never use that word again, that's for sure,” Shaw said. “It's a hurtful word; I know that. I am sorry and I want to apologize.”