A humanist officiant from New Mexico has written an op-ed in
which she describes marrying 110 gay couples as an apology for “the
way I used to judge.”
In her opinion piece, titled How I Married 110 Same-Sex Couples
and published Tuesday at
Advocate.com,
Marilee Harrison describes that heady first day Santa Fe county began
issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples.
(Related: Second
New Mexico county begins issuing marriage licenses to gay couples.)
“I stared at the screen in shock,” Harrison wrote. “Not
that I wasn't pleased – I couldn't have been more pleased – but I
could not believe marriage equality was becoming a reality in New
Mexico so rapidly.”
“Each couple was a unique delight, and though we moved quickly
to complete the ceremonies before the end of the day, the couples
included me as an honored guest in their deep emotional expressions.
I offered a choice between three sets of vows, which personalized the
exchange between the partners. The business of obtaining the license
gave way to moments of tears and smiles as they made commitments to
one another.”
“It is simply beyond me how anyone could oppose the commitment
of people who love each other.”
“Oh, wait. I do understand, because I used to believe this kind
of partnering was sinful – a bad choice. Until I met wonderful
people in whose presence I could no longer hold those views. My
questions, which I seemed to exit the womb mouthing, then became more
about how an ethical person or a loving god could harbor such
bigotry. Belief crumbled under the weight of discrepancies and
observation.”
“Perhaps serving as a secular officiant is a chance for
restitution, in a way. An apology for the way I used to judge, as I
was raised to do by loving parents and a nurturing community.”
Harrison, who lives in Santa Fe, arranges her services through
Facebook.