Actor-writer Wentworth Miller says he's
stronger for surviving suicide attempts as a teenager.
The 41-year-old recently out Miller,
who is best know for his role as Michael Scofield in the Fox series
Prison Break, revealed in September that he attempted to kill
himself several times as a teenager.
Miller declines Russian film festival invite; says he's gay.)
In speaking to gay glossy Out
for its upcoming Out100 double issue, Miller was asked what he might
say to his 15-year-old self.
“There are plenty of things I'd say
to my 15-year-old self, especially prior to his suicide attempt,”
responded. “However, I'd have things to say to him in the
aftermath as well. I remember carrying around deep feelings of shame
after I tried to kill myself, feeling like I'd stumbled or failed
life's exam. That I was now 'damaged goods.' What I would say to
that younger self – what I'd say to anyone who's walked a similar
road – is to focus less on the fact that you nearly ended your life
and more on the fact that you survived, that you lived to tell the
tale. And then tell it. I'd say, 'What you think of as scars are
medals. They're badges of honor, testifying to something inside you
that is determined and tenacious and enduring.' That's why when
someone who knows my story approaches me with a 'poor you' attitude,
my response is, 'Don't feel sorry for me. Because I know what it is
to be tested. I know what it's like to be broken and to have to pick
myself up again. I know who I am in those moments. And I'm stronger
for it.' There are people out there who have never been tested, who
have never been broken, so when life eventually comes for them they
can't say for sure how they'll respond. Maybe they'll pick
themselves up and maybe they won't. And my heart goes out to them.
Because sooner or later, life comes for everybody.”
Miller, Jim Parsons, Edie Windsor, Lee Daniels grace Out100 covers.)