Sally Kern (R-Okla.) was back in the news this week. As you may recall, her recently revealed anti-gay speech has been making the rounds on the Internet. To the dismay of the thousands who emailed, phoned, or showed-up on her office doorstep at the State Capitol to protest, Sally is not apologizing for calling gays terrorists and a cancer that needs removing. Instead she has run into the arms of the Christian right, who are falling all over themselves to congratulate her on her courage to speak out and defend her right to free speech. Free speech? As Bill likes to say, give me a break! We handed her the biggest megaphone imaginable by posting her tirade on the net. The name Sally Kern on Valentine's Day would have drawn a blank expression on even the biggest bigot's face, yet today she's the darling of the Christian right. For Sally Kern, it's all a dream come true.

I'm going to meet-up with you at the racetrack and make you rich off a single wager or give a horse a carrot to break your foot. Keep reading to find out which.

A transgender man is claiming he is pregnant.  Thomas Beatie, who works for The Advocate, transgendered approximately ten years ago, but kept reproductive rights. He now says that once he delivers the baby, he will be the father. A fascinating story.

Makeshift memorials appeared in Oxnard, California after a 15 year old boy was shot to death for flirting with another boy. Now gay activist are protesting the fact that the school system does little to protect our gay youth. Larry King was shot twice in the head on Feb. 12th after telling another boy he liked him.

Everybody knows the key to any successful outdoor event is a fair weather forecast. But according to all sources, it's raining McCain (see video)! That's enough for me to pack up my gay pride picnic and move it indoors. Click here for a photo of the storm system responsible for these alleged McCain showers.

It was our own Gay Entertainment Report that brought me news that Shelter, the gay surfer romance movie, had won the top Audience Choice Award at the Melbourne Queer Film Festival. It's a g'day for Shelter!

[Editor's note] Walter is slowly readjusting to everyday life after a six day stay at the Wonder Rehab facility.

“Sloppy's not coming,” Dan says closing his Moto RAZR version 1 phone.

I look up from my Lenovo X300 notebook and say, “What happened? An emergency Jell-O set?”

“You shouldn't call him Sloppy!” Ryan says as he flips through a little paperback of sex tips.

“He's busy indoctrinating young children into the homosexual lifestyle, children as young as two,” Dan answers.

“I don't bother with the two year olds, it's all pictures, crayons, and diapers!” Ryan snaps in. “You can at least have a rational conversation with an eight year old.”

I look up from our table and out the large windows. Outside the day is bright and signs of spring awakening are finally visible.

Across the street from the Starbucks where I'm attempting to work-in a quick post or two, a fit man in a blue Brooks Brothers suit talking on a Nokia N96 phone walks by. I check out his crisp collar, clean shave, and confident gate – each step exudes sexual confidence.

I close the latch on the Lenovo X300 notebook and unplug it from the wall socket, “I need to get to work early myself,” I say to the group, then add as I slide the notebook into its leather slipcase, “Vinnie DeAngelo, love, would you mind making sure these kids get home?” Then add, “How gay is that?”

Vinnie DeAngelo, who has been quietly writing in a red spiral bound notebook what I presume are crib notes for an upcoming movie or musings for a future memoir – a certain long-tail hit, looks up from his notebook, nods in agreement, and says, “I'm so gay I bleed rainbows.”

“That's what comes from too many Skittles®,” I respond.

I head out of the coffee shop and up the street in pursuit of Blue Brooks Brothers. I was too slow and cannot manage to find any sign of him, but continue north towards the park. After five blocks and a quick pace, I catch a glimpse of his leather briefcase moving into the park.

I walk down a crushed rock trail coming to a fork and choose to head into a tunnel. As I enter, I'm momentarily blinded by the sudden darkness and stop. As my eyes adjust, I realize Blue Brooks Brothers is standing just a couple of feet away from me.

“Hey, Walter, how you been?” he asks, surprising me.

“Fine....Well, I had to go away for a week,” I say. He moves towards me, his confidence more intoxicating than I remembered.

“Business or pleasure?” he asks

“A bit of both, I guess,” I say, then add, “You know, I've got a crush on you,” with a bit more tension in my voice.

“That's nice to hear,” he answers.

“I need to get to work...maybe next week we could share a pizza?” I say as I begin to step backwards.

He matches my steps, then catches up. “Tell me you have a crush on me too,” I say, hopeful.

He pulls me in closer, embracing me, gazes into my eyes and says, “I do. I do have a crush on you,” and kisses me.

Meanwhile, in Southern California.

Jack arrives at his home after a monthslong stay at Wonder Rehab – an empty home. He drops into his favorite chair at the end of the living room and takes out his iPhone. He scrolls down to the Photoshow application and presses on the folder titled Walter Wonder 2008.

Hey kids, get your own I'm So Gay I Bleed Rainbows tee at

Walter Weeks is a writer for On Top Magazine and can be reached at The Gay Slant pops-in most Saturdays at On Top Magazine.